Wednesday, March 14, 2012

R•E•S•P•E•C•T

What comes to mind when you hear the word respect. A little Aretha Franklin? You children being obedient? How about where your husband is concerned? How do you show him respect? 

In Sunday School we have been doing a series on "Shalom at Home". The section we are discussing now are the needs of a woman vs a man. Women want to feel loved, be shown affection, have a sense of security. Men want to be sexually fulfilled, shown respect, and I can't remember what else (oops, better pay more attention). I can't tell you how to meet your husbands needs on the first one but I can give you a couple tips on showing some respect.

I like to keep my house company ready. Not perfect but tidy enough that I can welcome a friend in to have a cup of coffee or tea with out having to worry about {the mess}. My husband also likes a picked up house. Not just the rooms that company will see but all the rooms. I tend to let my laundry pile up-clean-folded-stacked in my closet which is not shared with him and in a different room. This drives him bonkers!!! He is willing to do the dishes, vacuum, whatever he needs to do in order for me to put away my clothes. Out of respect for him, I really should make this a priority. The same goes for taking care of other little things he has asked me to do. He knows that I am busy keeping up with our 1yr old so if he makes a point of asking me to complete something then I know that it is important to him. By not doing the task is a form of disrespect to him. I don't always get to everything and honestly I forget things easily. He understands that I can get distracted but there are no excuses for me saying numerous times that I would call our insurance company and it takes me 3 weeks to call. He would rather me say that I had too much going on, etc. 

Don't husband bash!!! There are times that I believe it is ok to ask for prayer or advice regarding your husband but I don't run to them and say "can you believe what that...blah, blah, blah" For one, it will turn your friends against him. Even if you forget what it was that he did, chances are that your friend won't and will remind you of it later down the road. Second, it will not make you feel better and will only hurt your relationship with him. Are you saying something that you would say directly to him? Even then, really evaluate whether you want to share that with anyone or keep it private. 

Pray, pray, pray! If you find that you are struggling to respect him-pray about it. Ask God to give you opportunities to show him respect. Ask your husband how you can show him more respect. I am sure he will be shocked you asked then gladly give you some ideas.

There are situations where a husband can take advantage. If this is you- first pray about it by yourself then lovingly go to your husband and discuss your concerns. There are times when marriage is harder that digging a ditch by hand but it's worth it. 

What are some ways that you show respect to your husband?

~Jac



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